Look, buddy, you're wrong.
You really don't know how it should work and you're snapping at the good advice of experienced comrades. You're still growing and growing before such a system would eat up resources. Such a system any experienced programmer runs without any frameworks for one night, even on a hosting for 30 rubles, or even free. Even if there will be millions of such messages.
Need some real advice? Listen to what other participants are telling you, and in particular Rsa97
. Make a table structure, write there a couple of test messages and try to change the status of your message, for starters.
If you're worried about resources (unlikely though) measure how much memory your script uses, be pleasantly surprised and keep drinking your system.
Ask competent questions, for example: here is my code (you insert your code), why it is slow.
I have to spell out everything for people like you, so you don't get it?
You're the one who came here for advice, so be kind enough to write down your idea so that you can be helped and understood.